4.23.11 ~ Traveling, Dissertating...and Parenting

The last few weeks have been craaaazy. Jason and I got back from Vegas, four days later I flew to Texas for Jill's surprise 30th birthday party and to meet baby Ashton, from there I flew straight to New Orleans where I presented a poster at the AERA conference and participated in a career development workshop, and then I flew back to New York to prepare for my data defense. A data defense is a preliminary hearing that is sort of unique to my graduate program. It takes place after the proposal hearing and before the final defense. The goal is for your committee to review your statistical analyses and make sure you aren't missing anything big before you start writing up your results and preparing for your final defense. Sadly, as I was preparing the handout for my data defense, I came across a pretty big error I had made. So, I've been frantically rerunning all of my models for the last few days, revising my tables and results in time for my defense on Wednesday.

Right now I’m sitting at my desk at school waiting for some code to finish running. So I thought I would spend a few minutes updating this neglected blog.

Liam has sort of been participating in the craziness. He's had a lot of babysitters recently... including Aunt Helki who drove up from Baltimore to take care of him while Jason and I both worked last weekend. Together they colored easter eggs, made “dirt” from Oreos, painted, and played outside. I think he's had a nice time with Helki and his other sitters, but I can also tell he's a little confused. The break from his normal routine is a little tough for Liam to handle. He is a kid who likes consistency and predictability. In addition, because he has a hard time sleeping at school and when others are taking care of him, he’s missed quite a few naps. Sleep deprivation brings out the evil side of Liam. A few days ago I endured a two hour temper tantrum. For the first time since I became a parent, I had literally NO idea what to do. I was already so tired and frustrated from my dissertation problems, that I didn't have the mental capacity to figure out how to get him to stop crying without simultaneously giving in to what he wanted and rewarding his horrible behavior. Not that figuring out what he wanted was easy either. As far as I could tell the reason he was crying kept morphing. First he didn’t want to go outside, then he didn’t want to walk, then he didn’t want to come back in, then he didn’t want to take his shoes off, then he didn’t want lunch… and so it went on. In the end, he cried through lunch (without eating), cried through books and songs at nap time (without listening), and eventually cried himself to sleep in his crib. Even though he wasn't participating at all, the only thing I could come up with to do was go through the steps of his routine regardless. I felt bad leaving him in his bed alone in such a state of distress. But in the end, sleep is what he needed. When he woke up he was happy again.

May will be dedicated to time with Liam. I have some goals for him that April was just too busy for:

Start swim lessons

Go to the dentist for the first time

Start potty training

I got a cheesy photo app on my cell phone – it’s fun and I love it. Here are some recent pictures:

Ashton: so peaceful and beautiful... and he has the best big toes.

Proud Daddy - with good reason.

When Liam doesn't nap at school, he falls asleep on the subway ride home.

Helki and Liam's Easter Egg Masterpiece.

Spring in Brooklyn.

More subway snoozing.

The slide. Liam's nemesis.

4.06.11 ~ Baltimore and Vegas

Last week Liam visited Baltimore while Jason and I went to Vegas for his company's 20th Anniversary Celebration. So while we were doing this…..









(There was a lot of partying that went un-photographed).

Liam was doing this...
(Photos by Emily)








(written to me by Carol):

***
The ride on the way home went well. First, we didn't get lost and didn't run into any backups. Liam didn't get upset at leaving with us, and started lunch about the time we got on 278. He ate well and then took a nap. He was thrilled after he awoke to find that he could watch Winnie the Pooh. He relaxed in the car with his hands behind his head and seemed to enjoy the rest of the ride. When we got home, the first thing he did was play with the castle. Then we went outside until everyone else arrived. Liam had a great time running around and hiding behind very, very thin trees while I tried to find him. He ran around the block while I tried to keep up with him; fortunately, I only had to jog a little (he slowed down on the hill). I think he needed to get outside after riding for so long in the car.

As usual, he was happy to see Ethan, and seemed fascinated with Sydney. He would take time out of playing to come over and sit and watch Sydney, or when she was lying on the blanket on the floor, would lie down and look at her. He and Ethan played until bathtime and the usual bedtime routine went smoothly. I gave the boys bath, Tim read books and sang to them , and the went to sleep. I was expecting a rough first night, but Liam not only went to bed easily, but slept until 7. Thursday was a rainy day, but since both Ethan and Liam slept so well and woke up so happy, we decided to go to the aquarium. When they first woke up and were sitting on our bed, I put the TV on while I took a shower. Liam's face lit up, and he said "get to watch TV?"

Liam was so excited when we got to the Inner Harbor. He walked very nicely holding my hand and looking at the boats. He seemed very convinced that one of the boats was his. He liked most of the exhibits, particularly the larger ones where he could stand and see all the fish. He was particularly fascinated with the sting rays. There was one window at the bottom of the tank where there were a lot of sting rays,some swimming by and some resting on the bottom, and I think he could have spent the day just staring at them. He liked the jellyfish display, and was also fascinated with the waterfalls, which he first called "water down". I wasn't at all sure that he would sit through the dolphin show and was prepared to leave once he got bored, but he loved it. He spent his time there commenting on everything the dolphins did, smiling and clapping his hands. He talked for a long time about how the dolphins flipped and how they splashed the kids (the dolphins swam used their tails to splash the first four rows of seats).He and Ethan also liked the large bubble tubes, and Liam kept hiding behind them. He and Ethan both fell asleep on our way home so that was their nap for the day.

Thursday night, Jeff, Angela and Sydney, and my mother and sister came over for dinner and to get to see more of Liam. He was fascinated with Sydney, in between playing. Thursday night was only one of the two times Liam even cried. We had absolutely no meltdowns. He ran into the cabinet and, at first, didn't even cry. Then suddenly, he burst into tears, and my first thought was that we wouldn't be able to comfort him. However, he let me pick him up, and then sat on my lap and snuggled in while he cried. He did ask for Mommy and Daddy each once, but I told him you were on the plane, he seemed OK with that. We got monkey and his blanket, and he continued to snuggle for a few minutes without really crying until he felt better (that part could have lasted a little longer for me, but it was short). Then the rest of the evening went fine. I originally thought he would have a bruise on the side of his face, but there doesn't appear to be one. He seems to be fine.

He went to bed easily Thursday night, but woke up about 5:00 a.m. He must have been having a bad dream because he kept saying "no Ethan", "no Ethan". When I went in the room, he kept telling me either "I no sleeping" or "I no sleepy". I wasn't sure which it was, but it didn't matter, the message was the same. Told him Grampa and Ethan were still asleep, so he stayed very quiet. We lay together in the bed in his room and he played quietly with his monkey, and then fell asleep until 8:00. He again woke up very happy.

The weather on Friday wasn't that great, it was overcast and a little cool, but we decided to go to the zoo anyway. It turned out to be a very nice day. Both boys walked/ran around the entire zoo. He and Ethan walked/ran around the entire zoo. The only time they were both tired and asked to be carried was when we were on our way to the pavillion so we could have lunch inside. that was also the only other time Liam cried. He threw himself on the boardwalk and started crying. I sat down next to him and told him I wanted to help him but couldn't understand what he wanted while he was crying, He suddenly stopped crying and asked to be carried. It wasn't so much a meltdown as that the poor thing was just tired and hungry. After lunch, he was his usual funny self. His two favorite things at the zoo were these tiny yellow frogs and the giraffes. They were inside so we could get fairly close to them. He watched one of them for a long time, and announced "I need giraffe." Good luck fitting one into your apartment. It's funny, even though Liam rides the train when you come down here, it doesn't take away his excitement of riding on a train. They have a little red train that goes a short distance around the zoo, and as soon as he saw it, he was ready for a ride. He smiled the whole way and loved the train whistle. I still can't believe he walked as much and as far as he did. He and Ethan walked/ran around the entire zoo. It was not exactly your nice spring day, the they didn't seem to mind. So we cheated again and their naps were on the way home. When we got home, they played some more, had dinner, played with play dough, watched some of the move "Finding Nemo". and went to bed. He slept all night and woke up this morning again in a good mood.

***

And this (at my parents house with Mason)...
(Photos by Klaus)









Last he visited Jason's Dad's house. No synopsis or photos were sent from there. Though, it seems they had a nice time together.